Understanding Codependency as an Addiction (II) 

Before further discussion about codependency as an addiction, let's briefly re-establish a working definition of addiction: An addiction is a relationship with a means of relief. Where there is addiction, there is pain from unmet emotional needs. It is the need to relieve that pain that drives the addiction. (The Relationship Model of Addiction (RMA)). Denial and other defense mechanisms re....(Read full newsletter...)

The Relationship Model of Addiction (I) Codependency

One of the latest developments in the field of addiction is the Relationship Model of Addiction (RMA). The prevailing approach to addiction for the past 50 plus years has been a medical-based model. When the American Medical Association established that alcoholism (which later became interchangeable with chemical dependency as well as addiction) qualified as a disease-a "pathological dependen....(Read full newsletter...)

Identifying Common Tendencies and Characteristics of Codependency (III)

Codependency, as discussed in prior newsletters, is a deep longstanding pattern of considering the needs of others more than your own. Codependency can be viewed as an addiction, i.e. a love addiction or relationship addiction, as the relationship is driven by unconscious, unmet emotional needs (The Relationship Model of Addiction (RMA)). It originates in dysfunctional families where childre....(Read full newsletter...)

Identifying Common Tendencies and Characteristics of Codependency (continued) (IV)

Another running theme of codependency is the individual's inability to set and maintain clear boundaries and the lack of clearly established boundaries in their family of origin relationships. The blurring of boundaries between self and other, me and you, is often the key factor distinguishing dysfunctional relationships from healthy ones. Codependent relationships are merged ones. Relation....(Read full newsletter...)

Recovering From Codependency (V)

Just like an addict whose world revolves alcohol, sex or gambling, whatever substance or activity, the codependent's world revolves around other people. Codependency can be defined as a deep, longstanding pattern of considering others before oneself, caring more about others' needs than one's own (The Relationship Model of Addiction). Codependents are driven by unconscious unmet emotional nee....(Read full newsletter...)

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About Daniel Linder, MFT

Daniel Linder Relationships. I was born with a keen sense about relationships, was always assessing how close and intimate people are with each other. I had a knack for relationships. The importance of relationships cuts to the core of who I am. The combination of clinical training, 30 years of professional experience treating addictive, non-intimate couples and families, as well as rigorous self analysis has given me a lot to work with. I put what seemed to come naturally to me under a microscope in an effort to break the process of building healthy relationships down to concrete essentials: Understanding of Basic Principles, Communication Skills, Self-realization and Intimacy.

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