FAQ

Addictions

How do you distinguish between sexual and emotional intimacy?

Oftentimes sex gets confused with intimacy. Confusion is evident when words like, "We were intimate," "We made love," are used to describe what was actually a sexual encounter. A common misconception is that emotional intimacy naturally accompanies or will follow sex. Even great sex in no way guara....

Is it true, once an addict, always an addict?

It’s probably every addict’s dream to one day be able to use a substance or engage in an activity recreationally or in a controlled manner. The only problem is that it is impossible to do so. Forgetting that addiction is permanent can (and often does) occur at any time during sobriety. It is also common for ....

How well does the disease concept apply to addiction?

The disease concept had a humanizing effect and lessoned the impact of the stigma attached to alcoholism/addiction. This shift in perception ran counter to the prevailing ignorance at a time when alcoholism/addiction problems were associated with a lack of willpower and/or moral character. However, while the medical model led to a mo....

What is consensual agreement?

Consensual agreement (or group confirmation) is a key factor in the development of dependency and denial. Who was present during discovery? Who does the addict use with, or engage in the addictive activity with, on an ongoing basis? As the disease progresses, addicts tend to relate to peop....

What is emotional withdrawal?

While physical withdrawal is clear-cut, evident by physical symptoms and is treated with medication; emotional withdrawal is subjective in nature, evident by disclosures regarding emotional changes, and is not treatable with medication. It is, however, no less real. Here again we might be bumping up against the influence of the ....

When does the addict actually become addicted?

The usual response to this question is that there is no way to truly know. Words like ‘when’ are speculative, there is no way for anyone to really know. How long had s/he been addicted before there were visible behavioral changes and resultant problems? Common sense would tell us to assume that the addiction had been ....

Is codependency an addiction?

Codependency is an addiction, an addiction to another person. Just as an addict is driven by his need for relief through mind/mood-altering substances, the codependent person derives relief in the relationship s/he has with the addict. Codependency is putting someone else’s wants, ne....

What are the keys to a quality sustained recovery?

Coping with all of life's stresses is a difficult for anyone, but more challenging for the recovering person. Not only is the recovering person learning how to deal with being sober/abstinent (something s/he is unaccustomed to doing,) s/he must also gain the necessary experience and skills to transform the quality of h....

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About Daniel Linder, MFT

Daniel Linder

Relationships. I was born with a keen sense about relationships, was always assessing how close and intimate people are with each other. I had a knack for relationships. The importance of relationships cuts to the core of who I am. The combination of clinical training, 25 years of professional experience treating dysfunctional, non-intimate couples and families, as well as rigorous self analysis has given me a lot to work with. I put what seemed to come naturally to me under a microscope in an effort to break the process of building healthy relationships down to concrete essentials: Understanding of Basic Principles, Communication Skills, Self-realization and Intimacy.


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