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The Facebook "Friends" Phenomenon.
I'm seeing a relatively recent phenomenon that is posing risk to the mental and emotional well-being of millions of people world-wide, but seems to be particularly rampant in America. Let's call it a 'Facebook' phenomenon. What's happening is there is an increased confusion and inability to distinguish between "Facebook friends" from legitimate friends. Consider the number of people for whom friendship is lacking in their lives and who are seeking to fill this gaping hole with "Facebook friends." The addiction potential is there.
Sometimes people use Facebook to address relationship issues rather than contacting the other person directly. The question this raises is, "Is this person's Facebook communication to his or her friend a legitimate means to resolve or maintain a relationship when it may otherwise be in jeopardy." When you're announcing to all of your "Facebook friends" whatever may be happening in your life, are you talking to your friends or an illusion of friends (just who are your friends?); and when sharing personal details of your life, the questions of quality of relationship or level of intimacy can be raised as well. Can a full Facebook life fill the void of a life void of real friendship and intimacy? If one of your "Facebook friends" were to exclude you from an event in which other "Facebook friends" were invited, how much pain of rejection is there compared to the pain of feeling excluded from an event in which all your other friends were invited and you weren't?
From a clinical perspective, there's no doubt that having more conversations about who are really your friends and just what constitutes 'friend' would help to clarify the difference between the two.
Daniel Linder MA MFT
Addiction, Recovery, Relationships Specialist
Intervention Services, Consulting & Training
(415) 456-0802
http://relationshipvision.com
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About Daniel Linder, MFT
Relationships. I was born with a keen sense about relationships, was always assessing how close and intimate people are with each other. I had a knack for relationships. The importance of relationships cuts to the core of who I am. The combination of clinical training, 25 years of professional experience treating dysfunctional, non-intimate couples and families, as well as rigorous self analysis has given me a lot to work with. I put what seemed to come naturally to me under a microscope in an effort to break the process of building healthy relationships down to concrete essentials: Understanding of Basic Principles, Communication Skills, Self-realization and Intimacy.