Daniel Linder's Blog
Wednesday 18th August 2010 Daniel Linder
I'm seeing a relatively recent phenomenon that is posing risk to the mental and emotional well-being of millions of people world-wide, but seems to be particularly rampant in America. Let's call it a 'Facebook' phenomenon. What's happening is there is an increased confusion and inability to distinguish between "Facebook friends" from legitimate friends. Consider the number of people for whom friendship is lacking in their lives and who are seeking to fill this gaping hole with "Facebook friends." The addiction potential is there.
Sometimes people use Facebook to address relationship issues rather than contacting the other person directly. The question this raises is, "Is this person's Facebook communication to his or her friend a legitimate means to resolve or maintain a relationship when it may otherwise be in jeopardy." When you're announcing to all of your "Facebook friends" whatever may be happening in your life, are you talking to your friends or an illusion of friends (just who are your friends?); and when sharing personal details of your life, the questions of quality of relationship or level of intimacy can be raised as well. Can a full Facebook life fill the void of a life void of real friendship and intimacy? If one of your "Facebook friends" were to exclude you from an event in which other "Facebook friends" were invited, how much pain of rejection is there compared to the pain of feeling excluded from an event in which all your other friends were invited and you weren't?
From a clinical perspective, there's no doubt that having more conversations about who are really your friends and just what constitutes 'friend' would help to clarify the difference between the two.
Daniel Linder MA MFT
Addiction, Recovery, Relationships Specialist
Intervention Services, Consulting & Training
(415) 456-0802
http://relationshipvision.com
Wednesday 18th August 2010 Daniel Linder
Hi Daniel,
-I googled- and landed on your article about Sober Relationships. My name is xxxxx, xx yrs old. I feel like you were right-on with many of your points, for example, "the sleeping giant" and "over-involvement" within a casual relationship. I have quit drinking several times, I'm now at 67 days no booze and I feel lonely. But like you mentioned, I have so much "baggage" ....
Saturday 12th June 2010 Taye B. Corby
When we relax in what some call the 'BodyMind', we create a physiological change deep inside of us at a cellular level.
Although many of us know how to relax physically, few of us really understand how to move into emotional and energetic safety which gives us access to the more conscious front part of our brain, where we can tap into limitless choice, wisdom, integration and awareness.
The q....
Wednesday 23rd December 2009 Daniel Linder
RelationshipVision® is an online relationship training resource intended to serve as a source of invaluable information about creating emotionally nourishing relationships.
Whether single or in a relationship, in recovery from addiction or simply in pursuit of better relationships, a helping professional or student, RelationshipVision is the number one place to go for guidance and psycho-educa....
Saturday 24th October 2009 Daniel Linder
Unlike a number of other commonly abused substances, i.e. alcohol, benzo-diazapines, cocaine and methamphetamine are not drugs which pose any significant (physical) withdrawal risks. However, that being said, a medical screening would be recommended routinely for those seeking treatment for cocaine or methamphetamine addiction to rule out damaging effect those toxic substance could have on the bo....
Wednesday 21st October 2009 Daniel Linder
Interesting choice of words in your question...'Just taking the meds my doctor told me to" is a passive approach to your self-care. I'm assuming the meds you are referring to are on the order of pain meds and were prescribed in an effort to relieve pain. If your intent in seeing your doctor in the first place had nothing to do with wanting to get high or seeking relief from emotional pain, you wo....
Thursday 30th April 2009 Daniel Linder
How do you regain friendship only after you slept with someone that you would rather keep as a friend? You do not really jive sexually - message given by him...
Response from Daniel...
The lure of sex blinds a vast amount of people to the distinction between sex and intimacy or friendship. "Don't make more of sex than it is" may be common sense wisdom we've heard before, but it's actually vita....
Thursday 30th April 2009 Daniel Linder
I'm in a relationship with a recovering addict... We started dating a little too soon after he got out of rehab (say 2 months) --obviously he relapsed... I being the only one who didn't know.... Now he is in a new program doing excellent. He's been away for 2 months (he went to a
program out of the country)... Should I leave him?
Response from Daniel...
The problem in your relationship goes bac....
