Articles / Newsletters

NEW!!! How to differentiate between healthy and unhealthy relationships?

By Daniel A. Linder, MFT According to Daniel, understanding the difference between the two increases the chances of being in the one of your preference, and if you are a clinician, it will enhance your ability to educate, assess and formulate treatment plans.  In healthy relationships, you’ll looking for:  An atmosphere of safety that enables both people to relate and respond to each othe....(Read full article...)

"No Intimate Relationships During the First Year of Sobriety!"

Recovering addicts hear this all the time in 12-step programs. However, this sound bit of wisdom is rarely heeded. Many have a hard time accepting that a hiatus from intimate relationships is necessary. In their minds, dating and new relationships seem benign. As long as I'm not using and we're not using and are in a program, I'm safe. Not so fast. Getting into an intimate relationship prematurely....(Read full article...)

Not To Worry

By Daniel A. Linder, MFT Nothing, not even the dreaded commute, was going to keep me from getting to my class on time. That’s just how it is for me: If I say I’m going to be somewhere, I’m going to be there. It’s not so much the hundred miles I detest as it is the hour, sometimes two, of dead time, in bumper-to-bumper traffic.   I figured I’d leave my office promptl....(Read full article...)

Homophobia, Anonymous Sex and Intimacy

I'm Daniel. I'm heterosexual and (was) homophobic. I can recall my high school days when gays were fags, pussies, dykes, freaks, outsiders, non-entities, people you'd always get support for abusing, the safest of scapegoats. I wondered why I (and others) invariably reacted with avoidance, indifference and disdain, whethe....(Read full article...)

Post Election Stress Disorder (PESD)

Are these the best of times or the worst of times? For many, these are the worst of times. What happened? What is happening? What is going to happen? So many people, possibly more than half the country are, to varying extents, casualties of the times and are standing helplessly in the face of an extremely bleak outlook; a colder, dar....(Read full article...)

Me, You, Us - Entering the Sacred Space of Co-creation

Intimacy is something we all want, yet it remains elusive, rare and mysterious. Some people have intimate relationships, but most don't. Lack of relationship fulfillment is the norm. Many of us want to know how to establish an intimate relationship-from single people who are wondering why they are still single to those in relationships who want a healthier, more nourishing connection with their pa....(Read full article...)

The Relationship Model of Addiction

Introducing, The Relationship Model of Addiction By Daniel Linder MFT In inherent limitation of the medical model is ignoring the fact that a pathological dependence implies that a relationship, one that is emotional and psychological in nature, has formed with the substance or activity (i.e. alcohol/drugs, gambling, porn, sex and love addictions). By neglecting essential emotional aspects ther....(Read full article...)

Finding True Love Through Intimacy

Finding True Love Through Intimacy By Daniel Linder MFT A lot of people have been asking about true love; is there such a thing; if so, what is it? Is it attainable; if so, how attainable is it? If it were just love, I wouldn't have so much difficulty. But, true love? Talking about true love is risky business. I can imagine taking a poll, going around asking people who are looking for true l....(Read full article...)

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About Daniel Linder, MFT

Daniel Linder Relationships. I was born with a keen sense about relationships, was always assessing how close and intimate people are with each other. I had a knack for relationships. The importance of relationships cuts to the core of who I am. The combination of clinical training, 30 years of professional experience treating addictive, non-intimate couples and families, as well as rigorous self analysis has given me a lot to work with. I put what seemed to come naturally to me under a microscope in an effort to break the process of building healthy relationships down to concrete essentials: Understanding of Basic Principles, Communication Skills, Self-realization and Intimacy.

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